AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[doubleppk]

aldkjaslkjdalkjdslkjadlakjslkjd

Gnome.

Attacked me.

DAMN IT! I told them it was dangerous but did they listen!?!? NO! FUCK. Why couldn't they take it with them?!?! SOMEONE HELP!

I'm in the closet.


... In other news. We have a helicoptor?!? WHAT?! Does ANYONE here know when/how we got it? The notes say it's in disrepair. I'll have to take a look at this. When the fucking creepy gnome with a KNIFE isn't trying to chop my head off!

Lawn gnomes are evil. Anyone not on the sub know about this? Or how to get rid of it??? Or something?!?!

Comments

[doubleppk]

Yes. Evil lawn gnome. Of DOOM. Help.

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

Gnomes are easy to handle.

[doubleppk]

How?

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

What's the problem?

[doubleppk]

It attacked me and it's trying to kill me.

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

Flick it away with your thumb and index finger.

[doubleppk]

... If I tried that it would chop off my hand. I shot it, it didn't die and it almost took my head off.

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

Then send in a troll or two.

[doubleppk]

... I don't have a troll army at my service.

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah. Get on that.

[doubleppk]

Great. How?

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

Step one: Clear your mind.
Step two: Extend your arm.
Step three: Concentrate on the troll.
Step four: I'm a little teapot.
Step five: Instant troll.

[doubleppk]

...........
What?

Explain Step 4. Also... I have to CREATE the trolls?

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

You make a pact with them and they willingly come when needed and summoned.

[doubleppk]

.... What? Oh. How? Um how do I find them?

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

They're everywhere.

[doubleppk]

Wait. So they could be here now and I just don't know it?

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

They probably are there. Invisible. You can usually feel them.

[doubleppk]

Oh. Well I can't feel any so they must not be here. Damn.

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

They're there. You're just not looking hard enough.

[doubleppk]

Ah... Sure. Well... I'm pretty sure they couldn't fit in here in the closet with me anyway. It's a very small closet.

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

Trolls are good at that. Do you feel any random warm air? They're breathing.

[doubleppk]

Uh maybe? There's some warm air near the vent. But that's probably just the heat.

[kongeriketnorge.livejournal.com]

Then that's not random warm air. That's the heater.

[doubleppk]

Yeah there's not other random warm air though... so... Maybe they just collect around you?