doubleppk | Nightmares

Nightmares, the opposite of dreams? Pardon me while I wax philosophic.

Everyone gets nightmares sometimes, the kind of thing that wakes you up out of an otherwise sound sleep with an overwhelming feeling of terror and makes you wish to never go to sleep again. Supposedly while we sleep our brain's have to digest the events of the day and to keep things going we dream. But when dreams turn to nightmares what relief does the solitary dreamer have in such a world where reality means nothing and control is already too far lost. Despite the supposed methods for being able to control one's dreams, I admittedly don't have the patience to practice it every night when I get nightmares so rarely.

Ever since I was little I had this nightmare about climbing a tree as high as I could go. Branches after branches. And sometimes it was thorny and I'd get cut but I'd keep climbing only to get to the top. And expecting to see all the world laid out before me instead I just found rocks and nothingness. And as soon as I started to settle in, I'd get attacked by all these crows. And even though I should normally be able to defend myself, I couldn't, so I'd start falling what seems like miles through the branches, getting cuts snaps and yet not dying, until finally I hit the rocks below. Only instead, I don't die or wake up, I just lay there... unable to move. And then along comes a um... animal...okay a wolf. shut up. and just when I think it'll help me, he sees the crows that knocked me down and basically seems to say it's my own fault and leaves me alone.

And THEN I wake up.

Anyways... I used to get that nightmare every so often for... jeez as long as I can remember. And I just got it two nights in a row now so basically... I can't sleep and I'm wondering if anyone else gets nightmares too or something or solutions. Or something.

[[ooc: 1/2 of it is a canon nightmare Fujiko mentions once to Jigen. The wolf and crows symbolism is from the show and I always that thought that was amazing. Anyways, trying something new with basically trying to have her forcibly show her weaker points in order to make her let people in more even though she's scared. The symbolism for anyone wishing to analyze is that she tries to climb the ladder of success and makes it to the top, but finds it's not to her expectations and it sucks, and then her own foibles and annoying aspects (the crows) knock her down. The wolf both represents herself and Lupin. It's the things she considers good about herself but that abandons her too when it sees basically she brought it upon herself and says symbolically, "you are the crows, that's all there is to you." Only the bad stuff, not the good. Fear of abandonement, fear of failing herself, fear of lovers not staying when she needs them because she's the one that fucked up, etc. Sorry if this annoying :| Just an attempt to show off her scared-side but still IC. fingers crossed for it working~]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Do you?

... No!

It just...

Confused me! I mean the wolf in the dream left.

Then maybe that's exactly why you don't have the right kind of sleeping buddy now do you? You are after all sleeping with a wolf are you not?

Your point? What's wrong with a wolf for a sleeping buddy?

If you have a wolf for a sleeping buddy, and the wolf in the dream left you to be broken and alone, doesn't the mean something?

...

I don't know?

Jyabura wouldn't leave me...

Hey.

Are you listening to his bullshit?

Fuck you, skull boy!

Yohohoho! I merely jest Miss Mine. Jyabura seems like the kind of fellow who'd stick by his girl even if they called him a dumb-rum-bum. Not to mention if you ask me this dream of yours signifies more that you are afraid you aren't good enough for him than he's going to leave you.

Yeah he would.... and that... that does sound a lot more like what I've been thinking... A LOT.

How do I fix it?

You're asking me for relationship advice?! The man who asks girls to if he can see their panties as a greeting?!

Not relationship advice. Advice on getting rid of the nightmares.

Jyabura...

He's an ass. Don't listen to him.

I know. I'm just...

I don't get what's wrong these last few days. And... I'm scared. If it was an outside enemy I could shoot them but something in my head? Last time I had this nightmare it was before a big mission and I got shot and I couldn't save Lupin or do anything... Maybe this dream really is about my past? I don't know.

I KNOW it's not you. ok? you won't leave me and I won't leave you.

I'm just... scared... and I don't know what to do. And I feel like there's nothing I CAN do. And I hate feeling so helpless.

...I wish I could...say something or do something or...when something's bugging you I'd usually just bite it. But I can't do that. I just...look, if something is coming, we can handle it. And if there's not, it doesn't matter. So there's nothing to be scared of.

Thanks Jyabura. <3

I think I'm more scared of it happening again than it meaning something. Although Fireworks says all dreams mean something but I think he's a few I.Q. points short of a full skull since he felt even green monkey dreams were important. ~~Weird kid.~~

Thanks.

...If it happens again do you want me to wake you up?

I didn't really know what to do.

Yes please.

It's ok. Just being there is plenty. Hum... I've admittedly never had an offer like that before. It's nice.

Heh. Well, you know me. I try. Doesn't work out a lot of the time, but I damn well try.

Hm. You succeed most of the time I think. And with me I don't think you've ever failed me yet. I don't expect you will~

(no subject)

agent-wolf.livejournal.com - 2009-04-19 09:09 (UTC) - Expand

doubleppk - 2009-04-19 09:11 (UTC) - Expand

Animals Dream Meaning Mystical Meaning: To dream of an animal was considered to be an omen for the future. Peaceful cows and bulls were considered particularly good omens but try hard never to dream of crocodiles, dogs or cats for these bring troubles. In the Far East, to dream of a green monkey means that a medicine will not work. Indeed to even think about a green monkey while taking a medicine stops it working. Next time you take a medicine try NOT thinking about a green monkey- it's impossible of course!

I told you I could prove it.

Huh. That is weird. Wait... so what are crows again?

Also, weren't you refusing to answer to the name "Fireworks"?

I did not answer to it.

Yeah you did. Twice in a row now. Doesn't that strike you as odd?

hongkingkong.livejournal.com - 2009-04-19 18:36 (UTC) - Expand

doubleppk - 2009-04-19 18:47 (UTC) - Expand

hongkingkong.livejournal.com - 2009-04-19 18:51 (UTC) - Expand

doubleppk - 2009-04-19 19:13 (UTC) - Expand