Action & Video ---> And now for something *completely different*

[doubleppk]

[Hello Luceti. Enjoying the normalcy after the shift? Oh well, nothing stays normal long here. And so we have Elvis, giving a rooftop performance to put U2 to shame. Really, why the Malnosso decided to kidnap an Elvis impersonator or turn someone into one is probably not a good thing to question. Especially since the truth is far far stranger and doesn't even involve the Malnosso at all.]

[Still, if you're a fan of rock'n'roll, Elvis, Las Vegas, Elvis impersonators (because Elvis was not that short, not that light-haired, and the accent is clearly a little forced), or just impromptu rooftop jam sessions, enjoy this. Who knows, they might even take requests!]

[And otherwise, Elvis will leave the building and go about the village, wiggling hips and playing the guitar.]

[Please feel free to ask why. Just. Why.]

You ain't nothing but a hooooound dog!
CRYING all the tiiime!
You ain't nothin' but a hoooound dog!
Crying aaaaall the time!

Well, you ain't never caught a rabbit, and you ain't no friend of mine!
YEAH!

Well-a, thank ya. Thank ya very much. [That accent man...]

Comments

[doubleppk]

O'course little lady.

[Jailhouse Rock might not be nearly as good without the drums and entire chain gang to dance with, not to mention it forces her to try to play the bass parts on an acoustic guitar, but whatever. JAILHOUSE ROCK!]

The warden threw a party in the county jail.
The prison band was there and they began to wail.
The band was jumpin and the joint began to swing.
You should've heard those knocked out jailbirds sing.
Lets rock, everybody, lets rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin to the jailhouse rock.

Spider Murphy played the tenor saxophone,
Little Joe was blowin on the slide trombone.
The drummer boy from Illinois went crash, boom, bang,
The whole rhythm section was the purple gang.
Lets rock, everybody, lets rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin to the jailhouse rock.
Number forty-seven said to number three:
You're the cutest jailbird I ever did see.
I sure would be delighted with your company,
Come on and do the jailhouse rock with me.
Lets rock, everybody, lets rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin to the jailhouse rock.

The sad sack was a sittin on a block of stone
Way over in the corner weepin all alone.
The warden said, hey, buddy, don't you be no square.
If you can't find a partner use a wooden chair.
Lets rock, everybody, lets rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin to the jailhouse rock.

Shifty Henry said to bugs, for heavens sake,
No ones lookin, now's our chance to make a break.
Bugsy turned to shifty and he said, nix nix,
I wanna stick around a while and get my kicks.
Lets rock, everybody, lets rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin to the jailhouse rock.

[disastergirl]

[When the song finished she started clapping. However, that was also when a rather important fact came to mind. She was confident in her ability to wriggle out of it, but still.]

That was great! I...don't have anything to give you in payment, though. I'm sorry...

[Time to put on her best sad facade!]

[doubleppk]

You must be even newer her than I am.

A smile is all I'm looking for Little Miss.

[Deep deep inside, that hurts to even say. She could make money from singings?! She'd written that off a long time ago. A long time ago. Too much heartbreak in it, it was easier to steal anyway.]

Now that you know that, would care for another?

[disastergirl]

[While she was new, she wasn't quite that new. It was still hard to adjust to a world like Luceti after her work as a bounty and treasure hunter.]

Okay! Show me the best song you have left!

[Aaaaand she was all smiles again in the blink of an eye. Subtlety was not her strong suit.]

[doubleppk]

[Sounds like Fujiko. Right down to the lack of subtlety.]

I don't know about best but...

[Hits up with Blue Suede Shoes. Feel free to dance, Fujiko would more, but it's hard to play guitar, do the Elvis hip thing and full out dance at the same time as singing as a man. Seriously.]

Well, it's one for the money
Two for the show
Three to get ready
Now go, cat, go

But don't you
Step on my blue suede shoes
Well, you can do anything
But lay off of my blue suede shoes

Well, you can knock me down
Step in my face
Slander my name
All over the place

Well, do anything that you want to do, but uh-uh
Honey, lay off of my shoes
And don't you
Step on my blue suede shoes
Well, you can do anything
But lay off of my blue suede shoes

Well, you can burn my house
Steal my car
Drink my liquor
From an old fruit jar

Do anything that you want to do
But uh-uh, honey, lay off of my shoes
And don't you
Step on my blue suede shoes
Well, you can do anything
But lay off of my blue suede shoes

[disastergirl]

[Well, she did a pirouette or two. That counted as dancing, right?

And she totally didn't almost stumble over her own two feet either. Nuh uh.]

Hey, what's your name, anyway?

[doubleppk]

Elvis, Elvis Presley, you can call me... the King.

[She can't go breaking character and giving it all away!]

How about you, charming Miss?

[disastergirl]

Elvis it is then. [Hey, if she wasn't going to call Cecilia "princess" then she certainly wasn't going to say "king" either.]

Charming, huh? [griiiiin.] I'm Jane.

[doubleppk]

Pleasure's all mine charming Miss Jane.

Still a New Feather to Luceti or have you been in our trapped city for awhile now?

[disastergirl]

I came in with the last batch of New Feathers, but I don't plan on staying here for very long!

[Well, she wasn't lacking in confidence, at least.]

[doubleppk]

You think it's that easy to leave?

[Clearly amused.]

[disastergirl]

No. If it was that easy someone would have done it already. I'm not going to let that stop me though!

[doubleppk]

Oh you never know, there's advantages to a place like this. Everything's free, even the things in the shops, and there's that Butler guy who works for free too.

[disastergirl]

The free things are pretty nice, but I've got things to do and places to be. Besides, it's the principle of the thing! If I can manage to get away and make a show of it, it'd be a perfect way to get back at them for taking me away from home.

[doubleppk]

Well, good luck to you Missy. See if you can't keep a record so the rest of us can follow your trail of bread crumbs, okay?

[disastergirl]

Well, okay. Since you sang those songs for me I'll try to remember to do that. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got work to do!

[and off she goes.]

[doubleppk]

[Waves her off. Though Fujiko half wonders how anyone HAS work in Luceti without wanting it, but whatever. She probably means escaping.]

[Besides she has a thief to go bother.]